Her friends were ‘busying’ her calls; she panicked. She had started to notice the gap in their relationship. Anne sat and wondered if they were fed up with her needy nature. In school, one of the boys who tried to have a relationship with her had told her she was too needy and suffocated people with her ‘love’. Anne was constantly uncertain of what move to make. Even after pestering her friends to help her make a choice, she would spend the following hours contemplating and asking her friends if it really was a right choice. She chose courses because her friends had chosen them. She would hold the same opinions as her friends only to fit in. Whenever she is faced with a difficult situation, she never tries to tackle it on her own. She would always look for someone(friends/boyfriend) to dump it on and tell her what to do. Her current relationship was shaky because her boyfriend was constantly irritated with her. She would always overreact if he was unable to pick her calls or reply her immediately. She was jealous that he had a good friendship with his female classmates. She would call him in the middle of the night to ask him if he really loved her and go on to described how distraught she would be if he ever left her.
SYMPTOMS: people with dependent personality disorder have difficulties in making simple decisions, have a constant need for attention and reassurance, and would never take any initiative unless it will make them ‘belong’. These people are highly prone to being abused in relationships(friendship) because of their fear of loss of that ’emotional support’ and the idea that for once, they would have to do anything independently. They are over accommodating and usually make excuses when the people they depend on hurt them. when they lose the people they depend on, they immediately try to find someone to fill the void.
CAUSES: caused by a combination of biological and development factors. People exposed to authoritarian or overprotective parenting style, chronic physical illness, or separation anxiety during childhood may be more likely to develop dependent personality traits.
MentalMondays by Akwama.